Love And Its Many Ways of Hurting You
by Spry Striker X
Summary: Riku is in love... But sometimes love just disagrees and knocks you down. AU. SoRiku, side AkuRoku. Half one-sided Sokai...
1. Love hates you

A/N: If any of you recognize this story, yes it is me and not one of those people who take stories and claim them as their own. This is my new account… so… Enjoy.

**Love is… weird**

Riku's POV

Riku watched sadly as Sora got dressed and ready for his date with Kairi, sifting through his cupboard, complaining that he didn't have a fashion sense and that that is why he needed Riku here to help him.

The frustrated brunette kept trying on shirt after shirt, but to no avail. He still said that he didn't look good. The silverette couldn't disagree more with his crush.

_Sora, you would look good in anything… _

"Sora… why are you getting so hyped up for one little date? You have gone on a date with Kairi before, have you not?" Riku chuckled, swallowing thickly when Sora took off his shirt and stood right in front of him, looking nervous. The silveret fidgeted while Sora took his hands in his own and giggled, a rather unmanly giggle at that.

"I'll show you." Sora said cheerfully while grinning.

"…Ok" Riku agreed nervous, his mind spinning with possibilities.

Sora then went and dug in his draw next to his comfortable double bed on which Riku was lounging lazily, and pulled out a small jewellery box, the perfect size for a ring.

Riku flinched when he saw it and sat up, his legs swinging over the side of the bed, his eyes wide.

_No... NO! No, no, no, no, no! T-this can't be happening! I… I… _

Riku felt a large lump in his throat try to choke him, and felt his chin quivering.

Sometimes, Riku was glad that his silver bangs were long enough to hide his eyes, which were now showing unbelievable pain and sadness. He could feel the tears welling up in his aqua eyes and tried to will them away. It didn't work and his eyes were rimmed with tears, now.

_B-But… I _love _him and he…he doesn't love me. He loves Kairi. Not… me._

Sora stood before Riku again, smiling like he had just won the lottery. He opened the box and handed it to Riku, who sat motionless and didn't accept the ring. Sora looked confused but that didn't faze him. He stood there, still smiling at Riku cheerfully.

_He will _never _love me…_

Riku was now biting with quivering lower lip, to keep from letting out a tortured cry or wail of pure despair. Sora was now fidgeting, concerned on what his friend thought because after all, his opinion mattered most.

"W-What do you think, Riku?"

"I… I am sorry Sora but… I-I have to go," Sora looked startled and upset. Before he could open his beautiful mouth, Riku spoke again, "I can't be here." And with that Riku gathered his belongings and ran, ignoring Sora's shouts and questions.

When he got out the house, he jogged to his car, easily outrunning the shirtless Sora, who trying to grab his arm, which he eventually did do. Riku, out of desperation and anguish, turned to face Sora and in doing so, his bangs had shifted to show his right eye, welling over with tears. They streamed down his pale face, glistening in the twilight, revealing themselves to Sora.

Sora flinched and let out an incoherent sound of confusion.

"W-Why are you crying, Riku? Did I say something wrong? I—" He was interrupted by a heartbroken Riku.

"You didn't do anything, Sora! This… has nothing to d-do with you. It's… n-nothing. I don't know… I… Please, Sora let me leave. I have to go somewhere, anywhere from here." With that Riku shoved Sora's arm away and got into his car and drove away while cursing at himself.

He only drove for about thirty seconds, at full speed, until he pulled over and got out the car. He sat beside his car on a gravel road, and let it all out. Riku let out a sad cry and dropped his head into his hands in pure anguish.

The tears rolled down his face, over and over but Riku made no move to wipe them away. He didn't care, anyway.

Before he knew it, it was pitch black and cold. Riku merely put his arms around his legs and rested his head on his knees.

_Six fucking years I've known him and I still don't have the courage to tell him… maybe its best. I wasn't good enough for him anyway… I don't even deserve him as a friend. Oh, God, what do I do! _

The silver haired nineteen year old let out a sob that represented his desolation and dejection perfectly, before he let out a sniffle.

He got up slowly, but fell back down. He let out an angry growl and got up again. Riku leaned against his car door and looked at the moon sadly and then closed his eyes, tears still leaking, but he thought of Sora.

Sora talking, Sora laughing, and Sora smiling. Sora. Sora. Sora.

He smiled forlornly to himself.

_Why does life have to be so fucking cruel?_

XXX

(Sora POV)

Sora was sitting on the front steps of his house, more confused than he had ever been in his entire life and his trademark pout gracing his features. Why did it feel like a ten ton boulder had hit his chest when he saw that Riku was crying? Why was Riku crying anyway?

_Maybe I should go look for him. He can't be doing to good if he acted like that. _

Sora ran inside his house, completely forgetting about Kairi and the date, and put on the first shirt he could find. It was black, really tight and showed off his curves and also had long black and white striped sleeves, with holes for his thumbs.

Only once he was out the door did he realize that he didn't have a car. He didn't linger and ran in the direction that Riku had sped off to. It didn't take too long, only five minutes of running, to find him.

He was leaning against his car on the side of the road, with his eyes closed, and was smiling sadly up at the moon.

Sora wanted to shout out Riku's name, but then thought that that might startle him and make him run off again. He eventually decided to sneak up on him while his eyes were closed.

He approached slowly and carefully, making as little noise as possible, which was hard because the road was gravel. When he got to about a meter away from Riku he relaxed a little, but only a little. He saw the tears again and flinched at the sudden drop he felt in his chest.

"Sora… Why…?" Riku whispered, his voice breaking a little. Only a few seconds later did Sora realize that he wasn't talking to him but rather himself.

"R-Riku…" Sora whispered softly, reaching a hand out and resting it lightly on his well toned arm.

Riku opened his red rimmed eyes suddenly and let out a sob.

"Why do you do this to me?" Riku said in such a heartbroken voice that Sora felt another stab of pressure in his chest, "Why are you here? You… have to… have to go propose to Kairi." Riku's voice broke again when he said propose.

"I don't have to do it right now… I am more worried about you. Why are you crying? Please tell me. I am getting worried about you." Sora said in a small voice. His whole body was shaking from nervousness and from the cold.

"I… I can't."

"Why not?"

"I just can't!"

The brunet was as persistent as ever, "Riku… Please tell me."

The silveret shook his head stubbornly while Sora pouted childishly, an underlying hint of desperation showing in his eyes.

"Why not?" Sora repeated sullenly.

"Because it's you!"

Sora was completely stunned, "What?"  
"I… I am crying because of you!" Sora stuttered out a response but it was ignored. "I have known you for six years and I have ever had enough courage to tell you this… if you hate me or don't want to see me anymore, I understand. Just tell me to leave and I will." Riku's voice was breaking in an inconsistent pattern.

Sora remained silent, waiting patiently, but inside he was dying to know what Riku meant.

"Please, just… before I say anything… can I just do something quickly?" When Sora nodded, Riku moved forward and gave Sora a tight hug.

Riku wrapped his arms around the brunette's waist in a way that a lover would, slowly and gently, and then he rested his head on Sora's shoulder. His long fingers traced patterns on Sora's lower back, while Sora put his arms around Riku's shoulders.

Sora couldn't describe why or how he was feeling the way he did. It made no sense. It felt like he was hugging Kairi, in a romantic way.

The thing that scared Sora the most was that he was enjoying this more than he would have if he was hugging Kairi. He gave up all mental thought and snuggled closer to Riku.

He had never really realized how nice and _homey_ Riku smelt. It was a smell he was used to, but he never really picked up on it.

Riku then kissed Sora's cheek lovingly, and much to Sora's surprise, he didn't mind. It actually made him get this warm feeling inside, as cheesy as it may sound. The taller of the two then put his lips to Sora's ear and said those three words in a soft whisper,

"I love you." The way he said it made Sora shiver, but not from the cold.

Then Sora realized what he had said.

XXX

Meanwhile…

(Kairi's POV)

Kairi was sitting in a cab, on her way to the most romantic restaurant in town, where she and Sora would have their date.

At first Kairi was very nervous to be at such a romantic restaurant. She actually felt very proud of herself for getting such a wonderful boyfriend, who took her on expensive dates such as this. She walked in the restaurant and told them about the reservation, thinking that Sora was already there. They told her that her partner wasn't there and maybe she should wait.

"No, that's alright. He will be here soon."

Waiters and waitresses had come and asked her whether she wanted to order numerous times but she still gave the same answer,

"No, thank you. He will be here soon."

After the first five minutes, she was ok. She nibbled on the bread sticks, trying to ignore all the lovey-dovey couples around her. The redhead's eyes widened when she noticed one of the couples going into the bathroom _together._

She merely looked the other way, at a couple sharing food. They were having spaghetti, and just like in _Lady and the tramp,_ they ended up with the same piece and their lips touched.

Kairi groaned and dropped her head into her hands in frustration.

But after the first hour, she was beyond pissed. She had no patience for Sora's forgetfulness and decided to go to his house. Where else would he be?

The annoyed redhead had tried to phone Sora many times but her boyfriend didn't answer, not once. She eventually went up to the hostess and told her that she had to go and ran out of that cursed restaurant.

She saw her dark blue Renault parked on the corner and tried to be calm as she walked towards it.

Kairi was driving like a maniac in the general direction of Sora's house, to see why the hell he stood her up.

But on her way there, she saw Riku leaning against his car with Sora hugging him tightly. She stopped her car far away from them, as to not gain their attention and sneaked behind a nearby bush. She still couldn't hear what they were saying.

Riku and Sora stood still, until Sora snuggled a bit closer to Riku. The silver haired male then kissed Sora lovingly on the cheek.

_W-What! Why did he just kiss Sora on the cheek! _

The taller male then whispered something into Sora's ear, which Kairi still could not hear. The look on Sora's face was one of shock, and Kairi could only guess what he had said.

She decided to stay where she was and watch for a little bit longer. Maybe something interesting might happen.

XXX

A/N: I don't know why but this was almost too easy to write. Seriously, the words were, like, flowing from my fingers… strange. Tell me what you guys think. If you don't like it, it's going to be a short story. If you like it, it will be longer. It all depends. Tell me what you think. I have the next two chapters written.

Hehe. Oh, yeah. In between writing this I was replaying Naruto: Shippuden Ultimate ninja 5… I cried in the part when Naruto gets Gaara back from Deidara and he is *dead* and Naruto is all like 'I couldn't save Sasuke and I couldn't save Gaara! I trained by butt off for three years, and not a single thing has changed…" poor, poor uke.

Poor Granny Chiyo.

RIP.

**I promise it won't stay sad! It will get better!**


	2. It really hates you

A/N: Update! Lol… Not many of you guys read this and that's fine with me!

Spittfyre(However the hell you spell your name): Please. Leave me alone. I do not want you to ruin my writing spirits, ok? Even though you already have. So… please, for the love of God, fuck off already!

**Love is… weird**

**(Sora's POV)**

"W-What? Did you just say—" The brunets piercing blue eyes

"Yes I did. And if you are disgusted by me in any way, please tell me so that you aren't uncomfortable," Riku said slowly, as if he were expecting Sora to turn him down, "Please."

"Riku… If I am disgusted by you, then pray tell… why am I still in your arms?" To emphasize he pecked Riku on the cheek, lingering slightly. He could feel Riku shiver against him.

"I am not saying that I love you in that way yet. I am just saying that… I like you, much more than I should like another man." Sora concluded simply in Riku's ear. He felt Riku freeze underneath him, making Sora chuckle lightly.

Riku's feet shifted and he leaned back against the car with a thud, taking Sora with him. The brunet was now leaning fully against Riku, not that the silver haired male minded in the least.

Sora brought his hand up and started to lovingly stroke Riku's hair, as if it was something he cherished. His hands then went to Riku's cheeks as Sora pulled away a little bit so that their noses were touching and their eyes were lost in each others.

_Maybe I like Riku more than I thought… I mean, yeah, I always have thought that Riku was really good looking at I might have had a teensy weensy crush but… I never took any of that seriously. Maybe I should give this a shot. _

It was a good few seconds before Riku spoke.

"Wh-what about Kairi?"  
"We can figure that out later, but for now…" the brunet trailed off suggestively.

Sora leant in and pressed his lips against Riku's lightly, like the touch of a silky feather. He felt the man underneath him whimper and stagger a little before he regained his posture and leant in to further the kiss with fervour.

After awhile, Riku deepened it all with his tongue.

Sora could not believe how different this was from kissing Kairi. It was so much more passionate and… pleasurable.

Sora tangled his hands in Riku's silky silver hair, his nails dragging along Riku's skull, making him moan into Sora's open and supple mouth.

Riku caressed Sora's sides with his hands and fingers, feeling the beautiful curve of his waist, up and down. They separated, gasping and panting softly.

_Oh… My… God…_

Every nerve in Sora's body was on fire and his hands were shaking in Riku's hair. His cheeks were flushed pink, making him look rather… adorable.

"You are going to make me crazy, Sora." Riku panted out before he pecked the boy quickly, pulling away before Sora could deepen it. He heard a small whine and smiled softly at the brunet before him. Riku looked him up and down, noting how the thin fabric of his shirt was clinging to Sora and how it highlighted his sexy curves. His pants were a pair of black skinnies, which were just as flattering as the shirt to his thighs and legs.

"Riku… I think falling in love with you will be… very easy." Sora said in a seductive voice before he kissed Riku again. Riku was practically nibbling on Sora's full, pouty bottom lip before he sucked it and went back to kissing him, gently and softly, like lovers would under the moonlight.

The older male wound his arms around Sora's hips and waist in order to pull him closer while the brunet tangled one of his hands in the silky smooth silver hair and the other on his neck, both of them pulling each other closer desperately.

The only sounds to be heard for awhile were a few soft moans, crickets chirping and lips smacking together.

Sora and Riku were in their own little piece of heaven, and neither of them wanted to come down anytime soon.

"Sora!" they both heard a startled voice call out.

They separated lips with a 'Pop!' and looked at each other swiftly before looking in the direction from where the voice had come from and gasped.

**XXX**

**(Riku's POV)**

Riku was in a total dazed state. Seriously. Someone could've whacked him over the head and he wouldn't have noticed.

He was still holding Sora's hips tightly and the brunet's hands were still in Riku's hair when they heard someone call out Sora's name. The silver haired male glanced at Sora quickly before he looked in the direction that the voice came from.

The brunets lips were kiss stung, all swollen and pink, and his cheeks were incredibly pink, but he looked rather… cute. He was taking deep breaths and his endless, sky blue eyes were filled with a satisfied look, as well as the pure excitement. Then those blue orbs swiveled in the direction where the noise had come from and widened.

"K-Kairi! What're you doing here?" Riku asked in a shocked voice.

There was Kairi, in a frilled red mini dress which emphasized exactly why so many guys liked her, standing on the opposite side of the road, glaring at Riku. She had a perfect body. Toned arms and thighs, pale but colored skin, firm breasts, a skinny waist and a flat stomach. Her face was… perfect. Everything was even, and yet her features seemed so alluring.

He mouth was open in a shocked gasp and her eyes held a murderous glint in their blue depths that made Riku feel the urge to be as far away from her as possible.

_This is bad! Really, really bad!_

Sora looked like a mouse confronted by a snake and was trying to say something but it was stuck in his throat.

"Riku! How _dare _you molest Sora like that! I knew you were perverted but you have gone too far this time!" Kairi yelled, waving her fists while Sora stuttered out a response.

Riku's face was blank as he stared at Kairi.

"K-K-Kai… I-I…. W-we…" Sora stuttered so much that the poor dear eventually stopped trying to talk. His eyes were wide, pleading, and staring at Kairi with disgust and fear.

"Sora! Shut up, this is between Riku and me." She then crossed the road rather fastly for a girl in high heels.

She marched right up to Sora and Riku and shoved Sora off of Riku and onto his ass, on the hard gravel. He let out a cry of pain, causing Riku to bolt down to him.

"Sora? Are you okay? Here, let me help you up…" Sora smiled weakly at him, showing his thanks. He kept glancing at his almost fiancé and shuddering while Riku took his hand and lifted him up.

Kairi shoved Sora down again and gave Riku a vicious slap. Her sharp, colorful nails grazed his perfectly smooth, or _once _perfectly smooth cheek. Sora let out a yelp and got to his feet to support Riku, who had fallen back against the car again, while holding his cheek, muttering curses.

Sora, even though he was being watched by his abusive fiancé, went all motherly on Riku. He made an absolute fuss of peeling Riku's hand off of his face in order to see the damage dealt to his secret boyfriends beautiful face. When he did manage to pry his hand away, he gasped at the state of his cheek. It was all red and blotchy, making Sora shudder. It even looked like it was stinging! Then…

Sora kissed Riku's cheek lightly, as to not inflict any pain on Riku, and then a light peck on the lips.

"A-All better… Riku." Sora said timidly, his eyes showing a great amount of affection towards Riku.

"Riku! What in the world did you do to him? He even acts like he is willing! He doesn't even like men! Let alone you! 'Cause if he liked you then why is he _with me?_"

This statement wounded Riku dearly, and it was visible in his teal eyes, which were tearing up again.

**XXX**

**Sora POV**

_I have to do something! She can't just hurt Riku like that and then hurt him with her words!But… Kairi is so scary when she is mad…_

Now Sora had to make a very important decision. One that could alter the course of his life.

Should he stay with Kairi, have a perfect life, children and a white picket fence, but be totally miserable life? Or should he stay with Riku and be totally rejected by society and his family, but have a blissful life?

XXX

A/N: That's all I have for now lol.


	3. Maybe you should just give up

A/N: Hehe. Haven't updated in awhile… not… so here you go! –Don't shoot me-

Remember that this story was never going to be one of my happier ones. Don't worry, though.

This is dedicated to **Yellow Gummybear**, for being my first review.

**Love is… weird**

Kairi stared at Sora with a newborn hatred as his crystal clear, azure eyes darted in a tear filled dance between herself and Riku. The look on the silveret's face told the brunet that he already knew that he had lost. Kairi on the other hand, was looking confident. A bit too confident.

"Well, Sora, who are you going to pick? Me…" she glanced at Riku in a disapproving way, before she moved her gaze back to Sora, "Or Riku?"

Riku was staring at the floor, dejected looking, while Sora was deciding, until, "Sora… You should go with Kairi… I am not good enough for you…" with that he started to walk off, mumbling.

The brunet stuttered, "W-wait! Riku, don't go… please!" But it was to no avail. He kept on walking and never looked back once, trying not to give in to the urge to look at Sora one last time.

"Yeah, you keep walking, you faggot!" Kairi yelled maliciously, while grinning. She then walked up to Sora and kissed him, quickly and roughly, as if saying 'You are mine'.

Sora wasn't paying attention to anything except for the slowly retreating figure of Riku.

Kairi was slowly dragging him to her car, talking to him, even if he wasn't listening. He wasn't taking anything in, except the fact that Riku was hurting; he was hurting because of him.

XXX

Riku sat on the side of his bed and stared at the wall, crying. How he hated himself for his girlish emotions.

_I shouldn't have ever said anything to Sora. I should have just said that it was none of his business and left him alone! Why did I tell him that I loved him! That was supposed to stay a secret! I think maybe I should go see Axel… He would understand._

Axel had also gone through the whole 'unrequited love' situation with his boyfriend Roxas.

FLASHBACK

He had been in love with the blond for over three years before he did anything about it. The thing that hurt Axel the most was all the girls he would see with Roxas, knowing that they got to be with him and kiss him. Axel hated himself for liking another guy, even though he couldn't help it.

It was inevitable, though. Roxas was admired by everyone and was the A-student who could do no wrong. Not that he ever did do anything.

The redhead resorted to slitting his wrists in order to get the emotions out of him. It was his only way of getting relief from his everyday hell as Roxas' right hand man, his best friend and his… Gay friend. Not that Roxas knew he was gay until he confessed. But back to Axel's suicidal story…

They went to a pool party together once, as friends, because Namine, the blonds' girlfriend, had recently dumped him because he 'didn't pay enough attention to her'. Axel was excited because he would get to see Roxas without a shirt on but… Then he would also have to go shirtless… which meant that Roxas would be able to see his newly acquired tattoo, which were 3 black stars, one on each hip bone and one right above his… manhood.

Roxas would only be able to see two of them, thank god. They each represented one year, one year that Axel had been on love with Roxas and not told him. The tattoos on his face, the upside down purple teardrops under both eyes, were his 16 birthday present from Reno, his older brother.

He also had tattoos on his arms and wrists. The ones on his wrists were, on his left wrist, was a blue outline of a heart with a small gold crown on top, representing his love for all of his close friends, family and… Roxas. The one on his right was a red heart with a thick black outline and thorns piercing the heart and then surrounding it. It represented the two times that he had fallen in love with people and gotten his heart broken, even if the second time hadn't been voiced yet, and the first… was actually a girl. They were both thirteen and… she died in a car accident.

He still missed her green eyes and blonde hair… her high pitched voice… But Roxas was more important. Majorly more important than anything in his life. He always has to make sure that he never cut the tattoos on his wrists when he was cutting himself. He also had a few piercings. He had his belly pierced (On a dare… It actually looked rather sexy), his ears, a lip ring (Which he only put on when he was in a good mood, which was becoming decreasingly less) and a few piercings in his… lower regions.

At the party, which was in the evening, Roxas, being shirtless and tipsy was a bit too much for Axel to handle. The image of Roxas grinning like an idiot, darn his beautiful smile, while the water dripped down his chin to his lithe little body that was begging to be played with…his wet chest… perky nipples… his almost there abs… his v-line, from being on the swimming team… He was so amazingly, tantalizingly _wet…_

That was the first night that Axel had masturbated to thoughts of Roxas. But his older brother Reno had unthinkingly walked in just as he was moaning Roxas' name in ecstasy as he came.

Of course, his brother had grilled him about it, taunted him on being a 'fag' and threatening to tell Roxas, if he didn't do the older redheads homework.

He was so mortified at himself for _masturbating to Roxas_ that he cut a little too deep and woke up the next morning in the hospital, Roxas crying beside him.

Roxas was the one who had found him, lying in a pool of his own blood, and called an ambulance. In the hospital, Axel finally confessed his love for Roxas. Roxas had shouted and yelled at him, called him offensive things and left.

Axel wanted to die this time. No more slitting. He wanted to slice and cut. He wanted out of this life, out of this hell where he was tortured by thoughts and feelings, feelings that could get him beaten up.

That night, Roxas had an ultimatum.

He actually did love Axel, but he just hadn't looked at him in that way before. He had never noticed how beautiful and amazing his best friend was. He had never seen his remarkable kindness, hilarious sense of humor, never-ending patience and passion before. Or the way that his impossibly green eyes would light up when he paid attention to the redhead, praising him or even just talking to him. Also, Axel would always defend Roxas, even against Seifer, the towns bully. Another thing he noticed was that in all the time that he had known Axel, he had never seen him with anyone, boy or girl. The thought of Axel, his Axel, with anyone else made him get this weird feeling in his stomach.

He really loved Axel, even if he hadn't realized it until now.

He decided that he wasn't gay. It was just Axel. He only had eyes for the redhead. The goof that could always make him smile, no matter what.

Roxas went to see Axel once he was released from the hospital again, hoping that he could still salvage the relationship from ruin.

Axel was on sitting on the bathroom floor again, his tattooed arms wrapped around his knees, holding a knife with tears streaming. He hadn't cut himself yet and Roxas was heartbroken, merely at the sight of his best friend so sad and desolated.

He went and sat next to him, muttering a small "Hey."

The redhead didn't even look at him. He kept staring at the floor, biting his lip to keep the wails and sobs back, his eyes red from crying. All Axel did was nod, as if he was acknowledging that Roxas was there, but also that he didn't really care.

Roxas had felt awkward while trying to figure out what to say to Axel. Maybe he could just say sorry and then just tell him his feelings? Roxas was lost in his thoughts and didn't even notice Axel raising the knife to his wrist.

The blond heard a hissed intake of breath and glanced at Axel, seeing the dripping blood and the pain and excitement in the redhead's teary eyes. He immediately grabbed the knife and threw it out of the bath room before he grabbed Axel by the neck and dragged him into a kiss.

Axel was shocked and scared. He would have gasped, but his lips were a little bit busy. This was all that he had ever wanted to kiss the blond one last time before leaving earth. He made the most of it and began to tentatively respond, before he started to respond cautiously. They eventually separated and when they did… Roxas hugged Axel like he was the most important thing in the world, crying and whimpering Axel's name.

"Roxas? W-why…?" Axel had whimpered into the blond hair that smelled like vanilla. Roxas began to kiss Axel everywhere within his reach. His neck, chin, jaw, lips, nose, cheeks, eyelids, temple, forehead, hair and then he took his hand. He kissed his hand softly with his eyes closed, sniffing.

"Please, Axel, don't ever, ever, ever, ever think about killing yourself again!" He had whispered into Axel's hand, his voice breaking when he said Axel's name.

"… No one would miss me," Axel said and then cupped Roxas' cheek, "Y'know… It was always you. I never stopped thinking about you, ever. I never wanted to be without you, but if you hated me… then I wouldn't want to be anywhere. You… are all I have ever wanted. Kind, sweet, gentle, funny, honest, loyal, adorable, lovable, caring, passionate, beautiful, inside and out… and never within my reach…" He then kissed Roxas' right cheek, his hand still caressing the other cheek.

"B-but… I am within your reach, Axel. I am so sorry about how I reacted… I was being so ignorant and stupid. I want to tell you something…" He leaned into the hand that was caressing his cheek softly while closing his eyes. His hand felt so warm and comforting, something the blond could get used to.

"What is it?" Axel whispered softly, his eyes still tearing up as he looked at Roxas, whose eyes were still closed, as he leaned into his hand.

"I realized… last night… I love you. I always have… but I only realized that I was _in _love with you after the hospital. Please forgive me! I never meant those things in the hospital! I was confused and scared…"

Axel looked disbelieving, frowning slightly, his lips pouting, "Then why did you put me through years of torture, of me dying for your affection and attention? I was always with you… always wanting you… always loving you…" Axel sighed and let a few tears roll down his cheeks.

"Axel… I am so sorry for what I put you through. How do you think I feel, knowing that I caused someone to try and kill themselves? Someone I cared for deeply. I just never saw you in that way until now… Please Axel… I love you so much…" Roxas buried his face in Axel's neck, crying tears of guilt.

"Roxas… Roxas, i-it's… Okay now. I am not going to leave you. If I had known this sooner than I would have never tried to kill myself…" He pulled back so that he could see the blonds' angelic face, "Look at me…" He whispered softly before he kissed Roxas gently, caressing his lips with his own. How long he had yearned to taste those beautiful lips… he didn't know. But he was happy. Happier than he had ever been with Larxene or anyone else.

When Roxas pushed his tongue into Axel's mouth… the redhead almost died from the amazingly sensual feeling. It felt so right and good and made him feel all tingly inside. It was still gentle and innocent, the kiss was. Hands did wander, and moans were emitted… but they now knew the love that they felt for each other was right.

END FLASHBACK

Riku sighed as he remembered the story of Axel and Roxas… It was so sweet and inspiring. He could somewhat relate to them, except there was no girlfriend involved with Axel and Roxas. Nothing could have stopped them except themselves.

He walked downstairs to get his car keys, but he saw a message on his phone.

_Riku… Please call me. I need to speak to you._

_Love, Sora XXX_

Riku sighed and then put his phone in his pocket. Maybe he would phone Sora later when he didn't feel so depressed. The silveret walked out of his flat and locked it, before he headed over to the elevator. He pressed the button and waited for the corresponding 'ding!' Once it came, and the elevator opened, he got inside and leaned against the wall as the doors closed again.

Once downstairs, he went straight to his car and drove to Axel's place. Roxas was living with Axel, and they were oh, so happy together. It made Riku jealous and happy at the same time.

Three knocks and then the door opened. Roxas opened, wearing a pick apron that said, "Get me a beer, woman!" and a picture of a man sitting on a couch. Riku chuckled and then hugged Roxas.

"Hey, Rox. Nice apron." He said and then got a slap on his back from Roxas. They pulled away from each other and then walked into the kitchen, were Axel was 'trying' to make cookies. The redhead was cutting the dough into small hearts and stars, flour all over himself.

"Hey Riks, long time no see, hey buddy?" He gave Riku a friendly hug before he pecked Roxas on the cheek and went back to cutting the dough.

"Yeah, hey Ax…" He said in a not-so-excited voice, while Roxas and Axel exchanged looks.

"What happened? And don't give me some shit like 'it's nothing' or 'I'm fine' or I swear I will cut off your—" Roxas cut him off with a raised hand.

"Riku… What happened?" He asked is a cautious voice.

"I-It's… It's Sora… He was going to propose to Kairi, and I sort of ran away from him and I was crying and then I told him that I loved him and then he kissed me and the—"

"Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! What did you say? Speak slowly, Riku." Axel said while Roxas gazed at Riku with a confused look.

"He kissed you? Wow." He said in awe, while grinning at Riku.

"But then Kairi saw us kissing! And then Sora went with her… then she called me faggot." He sat down on their red couch and let his head fall into his hands.

Axel stood up, an angry look on his chiseled face, "That bitch! I hate her!" Roxas calmed him down and then took Riku's hands in his own.

"Riks, its all going to work out. I know Sora and he hates it when he is told what to do. Has he tried to call you yet?"

"Yeah… he sent me a message but I haven't replied yet… I don't know what to say." He looked uncertain of himself for a second but then his face went neutral.

"Phone him! Phone him, NOW!" Axel yelled, making Roxas and Riku jump, "You can't miss this chance, Riku!"

"Okay… I'll be right back…" They both smiled at the silver haired man and then went back to making their 'love cookies'.

XXX

A/N: Wow… that was long It basically wrote itself Review!


	4. New meaning to 'walking in on'

Sora lay on his bed, staring sadly at the dull wall above him while his friend Demyx tried to cheer him up a bit.

"So then Kairi just left? Ad you had to walk home after all of that? That little—" He was cut off by a glance from Sora.

Sora spoke softly, his voice barely audible, "Dem, I think… I think I really messed up."

"Lies. You haven't even made a choice yet… so how could you have messed up already?" the sandy blond pouted at his friend before muttering, "Kairi messed up. God I hate that little, messed up b— Sorry!"

Piercing blue eyes connected with a pair of sea green eyes, "Even though I temporarily hate her, I still love her. A few hours ago, I wanted to marry her. But, yes… I love her… even though the feeling is suddenly dull in comparison… to…" he trailed off softy.

"Dull in comparison to what…?" the blond questioned as he spun around in the swivel chair at which he was sitting.

The brunets cheeks turned a light pink as Demyx chuckled and grinned wolfishly, "My, my! What a fun colour you've turned! What _really_ happened earlier?"

Sora sighed. He was now staring at his hand, the nails seemingly his enemy as he picked and picked away at them.

"Well… I told Riku that I was going to ask Kairi to marry me and he got really upset and left. I went to go find him and we talked… a little… and then I kinda, sorta, maybe, not reeeeally…" He laughed at the look of anticipation on Demyx's face, "Kissed him. A lot. Holy _fuck_, Dem, he can kiss."

The blond looked dumfounded for a second, but then he got this really perverted look on his face, "So… you guys made out?"

"Uh, yeah." Sora blushed as he remembered that tingly feeling all over, that slight, tantalizing pleasure just below his navel as he felt Riku push his tongue against his.

"You look flushed, Sor, "Demyx joked lightly, "He couldn't have been _that_ good."

Sora sent him a challenging look, "He practically tongue raped me. He is an amazing kisser! Even better than Kairi." He smiled at first, then he realized that he was taking preference and sighed.

"Well, if he can make you feel that good with only a kiss, imagine what it will be like when you guys have sex!" Demyx giggled to himself, his thoughts taking a turn in _that_ direction.

"Yeah, about that…"

Demyx looked shocked, "You guys _already_ had sex!"

"What? No! I'm just saying that I don't know who to choose, you bonehead." Sora started to pick at his nails.

Demyx started to hum softly to himself, still spinning in the swivel chair.

Sora started at him in thought, before Demyx broke the silence, "What? I wouldn't know who to pick! But if I were you… Riku. That's all I am saying. No matter who you choose, somebody is going to get hurt."

Sora blinked owlishly before he closed his eyes completely and sighed.

Riku locked his car, hearing the audible 'beep!'' in return as he walked up the steps of Sora's duplex.

As he was about to knock, the door opened and Sora was staring at him with blue, _blue_ eyes that looked confused.

"Sora, I—" He was cut off by a pair of warm, plush lips against his own. They moved slowly, almost in a seducing way before they were gone, Riku's lips pursuing them for a second.

"Please… come in, Ri." He half-whispered to him, before taking a few steps backward to let Riku in.

As soon as he was inside he hugged him tightly, "I am so sorry for all the pain that I have caused you, Riku. The last thing I would want to do is hurt you, Ri." He let go of him just as quickly as he had grabbed him.

Riku was silent for a few seconds, before, "Sora.. none of this is your fault. You don't need to feel so guilty…" Even to himself, his voice sounded strained and pained. His hands found their way back into the pockets of his grey hoodie.

"I just came by to tell you that I might go stay with my cousins for a bit. Or maybe with Axel and Roxas. I just want to… I just want to get away from things for a bit."

Sora blinked, "What? No! Why…" His voice fell flat on the floor as Rku continued speaking.

"Kadaj said I could go there whenever I wanted… I am pretty sure that Axel or Roxas wouldn't mind when I go. Now I just need to make a decision." He looked away from Sora for a second, almost as if he felt guilty for the sad look on the brunets face.

"… I don't want you to go, Riku." He muttered softly.

Riku sighed, "Sora, I love you, and you know that, but you can't just string me along!" His voice was toned down, but still managed to be loud.

Sora thought for a moment, "Maybe I should leave to give you _and_ Kairi some space for awhile."

Now it was Riku's turn to be silent and in thought.

"Sora, none of this is your fault. It is all my fault, so its me who has to do the damage control, ok? I just came by to say goodbye. I might leave on Thursday—" He was once again cut off by Sora's lips against his. This time, the kiss was like the first. Rushed, desperate, quick and brusque. The next few were slow, and smooth.

Just like before, they clung to each other, pulling each other closely quickly, their mouths only separating for a change of angle or for a quick breath of well-needed air.

Sora leant back against the wall in the hallway with a thud, pulling Riku by the collar with him, their lips smacking together loudly.

Demyx chose that moment to go down the stairs and catch them in that furious embrace.

"Well, fuck. This isn't awkward at all." He said while grinning as they separated with a wet sound of parting.

Riku left shortly after saying a quick goodbye to Sora.

Demyx was having his queer-squeal-fit for the day as Sora tried to become invisible.

Riku sat silently at the robot, waiting for it to turn green before speeding off. He wasn't sure where he was going, but wherever that was, he was going to get there quickly.

He ended pulling off at Axel's place. Soon enough he was knocking at the door. Once, twice… no answer. It was quite weird, since Axel's car was in the driveway…

He went in through the bedroom window after scaling the garden wall. He hopped in without looking and fell to the floor with a thud and an 'ow'.

He heard a pleasured whine and looked up in horror.

He saw Roxas lying down on the bed, red, sweaty, shivering and apparently naked from what he could see. Axel, on the other hand, was nowhere to be seen. Once Roxas' one hand slowly trailed down under the covers to grip the large lump in front of him, Riku realized what was going on. He face palmed and groaned before covering his eyes and clearing his throat.

Roxas cried out suddenly then he opened his eyes, which were fluttering a lot, and jumped when he saw Riku.

He panted and groaned softly as he gave the lump a swift whack, "A-Ax… Please… S-stop!" He gave it another whack before a redhead of hair appeared in-between Roxas' legs.

"OH SHIT!" He yelled while they both tried to cover up frantically as Riku groaned in annoyance and somewhat disgust, his face still covered by his hand.

"Lemme… lemme just get out of the room and to the kitchen so you guys can finish. Ax... Where is your iPod?"

Axel looked confused by the statement as he clutched nervously at the duvet, "On the table by the front door… W-Why?"

"So that I don't have to hear you two go at it!" He walked out swiftly and then the two were alone again.

It was silent for awhile, but then Roxas muttered, "I feel violated."


End file.
